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“Ultimately, if I have any influence at all, I want to help people look up, and see that the Lord’s alive and well, and His love can change everything.”
After college, I, like most young graduates, had little to no idea what I wanted to do with my life. The world was at my fingertips, but my fingers were afraid to grasp any one thing in fear of choosing the wrong thing. With a heart prone to performance, I chose to go where I thought I was most needed, where no one else would go…in attempting humility, I pridefully set out to join Teach for America and spent the hardest year of my life falling flat on my face, over and over again.
Two years later, I flew back to Charleston to visit my now-beloved students and treasured friends who helped me through such a crazy season. To say the least, my visit was redeeming and filled with gratitude for the struggles. I was welcomed back to school by a stampede of children and football huddle hug in the hallway. A dear friend, had me over for dinner and put up a canvas on her porch. Minette and I had gone to Baylor together and she knew I painted as a hobby, but I never thought I was anything special.
While she cooked, I explored painting in an entirely new way. There was something significantly different in my heart since the last time I had painted years before, and without words, it expressed itself beautifully on my canvas…
Photography by Minette Hand
I spent years walking around blind to the colors around me, to the magic murmuring beneath my toes. In thinking I was “losing my life, to find it”, I was attempting to be someone my Creator had not created me to be. Picking up a paintbrush, awe and wonder captured my affections and I felt alive again…
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“And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it. ”
After years of accepting a life marked by anxiety and fear pursuing a life I thought I needed to live, I had stumbled on rest and peace in embracing my gifts and passions; it was intoxicating.
Still, arriving back in Colorado, I went back to my odd jobs and low sense of self-worth. I did not believe in myself as an artist, and did not think anything of it until a box arrived on my doorstep. Minette had sent me a box of her old paints from college with a note on the top reading, “You can do this”. She had put my painting up on her blog (P.S. Check out her work, she is an AMAZING photographer) and I had snapped an Instagram image, the next thing you know, people were inquiring about paintings…taking a leap of faith, I went to Hobby Lobby, bought some canvases, made a website, business cards and rented a studio. I found myself quitting my jobs and “Jennie Lou Art” was born out of courage to believe in the gifts I had been given.
Photograhy by Minette Hand
Today, I still wrestle with fear and anxiety, I am constantly afraid of not being enough, or doing enough. But fear subsides when I remember it is not out of my own strength that I do anything, apart from Him I am nothing. I can’t be afraid of doing it right or wrong, but simply embrace obedience and courage to let God use my hand how he wants. I am just a branch, He is the vine, and all He asks is that I believe in Him. It’s not easy, never will be, but it gets easier to trust Him…
xo
Jennie
Feel free to Contact Me. I will do my best to help and encourage you in the same way others have done for me.
Check out: http://minettehand.com/
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